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You're not interested in me, not even as friend material. That's fine. But I told u how vulnerable I was taking the chance to meet u. That's why I was scared to come over. I knew once I did, you'll never talk to me again. I apologize if I wasn't what u were hoping. I tried to be up front with u.

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I really did think u were cool, and really believed that we could be friends, looking for love and a little fun but when I came over, I wasn't myself. I was so shaken and unnerved by the plethora of emotions I experienced from having saw that certain special person I met before coming over for the first time inwoonsocket older women amature swingerss check months, Horny women in Salisbury Center, NY that it was hard to act normal.

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My nervous tick is to seem unnaturally perky and eerily smiling from ear to ear I was this way since hood when I would be forced by my mom to smile and not pout and cry no matter how terrible I felt in the presence of company and in family pictures.

So my goofy facade is the mask of my pain. But u, nor anyone that hasn't had the hood I had would ever understand that I scrutinize and beat myself up for any awkwardness or social retardedness I exhibit. Having had my flaws pointed out to me my whole life, it's hard to relax around new people and not end up acting like a total spaz.

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